
"Fear" is just a four letter word yet it can paralyze you dead in your tracks. Last September, I had gone in search for my creative spirit as if it was something lost, and what I found was that I paralyze myself whenever I start a new project. As in this blog. As in an art business. As in doing what I love most.....making art.
For the past few months, I immersed myself in a several creative books, took a trip or two to the museum, started a new sketchbook, and spent countless hours of visiting many creative blogs and websites. I started a habit of writing a daily
10 item list (today's list)
"10 creative experiences I would like to try this year".....1. make a handmade book-2. write and illustrate a short graphic story-3. lino-cut printing-4. hand built small ceramic pieces-5. paint a mural in my home-6. screen printing-7. create a website-8. sew a large modern quilt for my bed-9. knit a vest-10. make a
Louise Nevelson like garden gate.
A hard thing to accept is the fact that I do this to myself.
I began to think about a task I do every year with abandoned fear.
I garden. I have marginal success and yet I get so excited every spring. I read and reread my garden books and magazines. I browse through catalogs. I watch landscaping shows. I sketch and plan the plants I would love to add to my small, garden space. I buy new plants, I water and browse my garden almost on a daily basis, I am hopeful. I look for new growth and I am excited for small signs of success. I envision a garden that is lush and somewhat overgrown where plants mix and mingle. I look at my garden through rose-colored glasses. I am patient. I am content. I have no fear and no inhibitions, so why can't I apply this philosophy to the thing I love the most? Why am I so fearful of failing or not finishing something I haven't even started? So here it is, a proclamation, "I am acknowledging you FEAR and I am telling you to go away because you are no longer welcome here, you need to go feed on someone else for I am no longer your tasty morsel!" (sound of door slamming).